Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The sky seems a bit bluer. The air smells a bit sweeter.

Operation housewife...


Well here's the beef.
I've been let go at work.

It was a terrible shock at first. I felt betrayed and angry...and very, very, sad.
A "thank you for going above and beyond the call of duty for us" and a severance package does not make it feel okay. Even though they said I did nothing wrong, nor could I have done anything to change this corporate decision, it was still poopy. It took a few days to feel better, but with the encouragement and love of those around me, have helped to give me strength, to realize that I am much more than my workplace. I realized, through some serious tear shedding, that I am still a photographer. No matter which studio I work for. Mr. Weston, Jim, Alyssa and Ken-you will never, ever, be able to take that away from me. I have a passion for what I do, for the families I get to work with and for trying to be the best photographer I can be. No salary is going to change that!!

Since I was not fired, but rather "let go" I have no negativity on my record and I get the whole summer (and then some) to continue life with payment. So instead of sulking and crying and stressing about what is going to happen next...I am going to take this for what it actually is. An opportunity.

Last week I told Josh that my biggest dream is to be a housewife. I know that might sound silly, and might tick off my mom (who has always pushed my independence as a woman), but this is what I really want. It might not be your dream, but it is mine! I want to spend my days; gardening, sewing, cooking, baking, painting, writing music and musing over the love I have for my fiancée. Doing all of the things I LOVE!!

& when it is all over, I will return to working. I will find something else. Because I am a good person. I am a whole hearted, hard working kind of person. I have some photo shoots lined up throughout the summer already, which will help my portfolio growth outside of a studio. So you can imagine, I am very excited for what's to come. I have been supporting myself and working to eat/live since I was very young. Younger than most. So this is my opportunity to do things for me again. To enjoy my own company, my own wants and to make my ideas come to life!

No matter what, I still am me. Silly Shara, with people who love her no matter where she works.


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