Thursday, March 31, 2011

Hmph.

Well...it's Thursday evening. Josh and Jeff just jammed for a few hours. Work was decent for me...I made some paper carrots to use as a prop (in my studio), got my camera back from the repair centre, knitted two more bows..and well..have been feeling super emotional.

I don't know if this is just my hormones acting up..but every once in a while my mind has difficulty straying from the negative. Don't get me wrong, over-all I am a happy girl and my life is good.



I am feeling a little lonely.

Maybe i'm just jealous?
I guess, the teenie bopper in this adult body yearns for more.
More what?
More attention, more connection, more love.

I have accepted that I am different. I know how hard it is to find anyone who is truly genuine & nice & fun, let alone someone I can to relate to. The things that keep me happy are things that make me unique. They are things that most people wouldn't dare to bat an eye at more than once.

I'm not saying 100 friends would be ideal.
It's not like that.


I guess, I don't even know what it is! My guy is my best friend, but I don't want to be completely dependent. When he is not around, who am I with?

No-one.




No-one at all.

Just me!





Tomorrow, while he is at work, and I have the day off. I will do the normal me thing.

Get up, clean, eat, cook/bake, walk uptown to the comic shop & cuddle my pups.


(Just took a break from writing & ate dinner.)
So here's the kicker...writing this tiny little blurb, has helped me feel better already. Strange right? I guess I shouldn't take things for granted. Just because I don't have many "friends" doesn't mean I don't have any. I should be proud of being myself and being able to kick it alone.
Right?




Lucky for me, this cute boy has noticed I have been feeling down. So now he is trying to talk me out of my poopy mood. So instead of continuing this cry fest, I am going to stop feeling sorry for myself and get off of here! haha! 'Til next time, and hopefully a better mood, i'll be back!

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